Pink Floyd-
"But it was only fantasy.
The wall was too high, you can see.
No matter how he tried, he could not break free.
...And the worms ate into his brain."


Democrats v Republicans A boy walked up to a man who was catching crabs and asked this question, "Why is it that one of your buckets has a lid and the other doesn't"? The man replied, "I have capitalist crabs in the one with the lid and socialist crabs in the one without". The boy repeated, "but why the lid on only one?". The man responded, "Well, my boy, when one of the socialist crabs tries to crawl out, the others pull him back in. But when one of the capitalist crabs tries to crawl out, he pulls the others along with him. This is why I have to have the lid on the one and not the other".

Who reads what and why--
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are good at crossword puzzles.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn.t mind running the country, if they could find the time, and if they didn't have to leave Southern California to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a far superior job of it, thank you very much.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country but need the baseball scores.
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy provided, of course, that they are not Republicans.
11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.
12. None of these are read by the guy who is running the country.

If you have any comments, suggestions, or questions, please email me at

rkannan@cs.lsu.edu

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